"Bermuda, Bahama......come on pretty mama"
Well my friends.....as you read this, I am already off on my Bahamian adventure. JB and I, along with 11 other couples from our church, are headed to Eleuthera for a few days of teaching/training, service projects {I've heard we may get to build bookshelves for a school in need of them! That would be cool.}, and definitely some time taking in the beauty of the Bahamas.While this may sound wonderful to some of you...... for me there are all sorts of emotions balled into one big tangled mess. I am excited about being somewhere I have never been, about being there with some really crazy fun + genuine people, and about learning new things about myself and others. However, I struggle with fear when it comes to getting on an airplane....any airplane.....and to make matters worse {or better?}.....the airplane we are being chartered on for this trip is a vintage World War II plane! This plane is so amazing and cool....on the outside.....and one that I will take many pictures of.....but getting inside and actually flying in it....is absolutely terrifying for me. There are not many things I am afraid of....but I am afraid of this....{ being eaten by a shark might be my #2 }.....and will be facing my fear head on in just a few short hours. I do not react on the outside....I will sit quietly in my seat, and close my eyes like I am sleeping {yeah right!!}......all the while my insides will be churning, my heart will be racing, hands and pits sweaty, and I will be squeezing the ever living daylights out of JB's hand until we land. I will relax for a couple days before I start fretting about the trip back home. I know....it's pathetic, and many friends have told me to just "take a little something to take the edge off"....but I am too proud and stubborn for that.You see....this fear of mine is a huge predicament.... because I absolutely LOVE to travel and see new places. I love experiencing new scenery and cultures...and feel it is essential to understand and comprehend how others around the world live. I just don't like the method of transport to get to some of these places......and don't you all even try to tell me "you are much safer in a plane than in a car"....heard it a million times.....does not compute in my little brain. I would rather drive to Africa {if that was possible} in a month than get on a plane and be there in several hours. UGH!Ultimately though, in the middle of all of this fear and angst......there is truth. The truth is.....my life is in the hands of a Creator who is far more capable than I am, everything will be fine even if things don't go as I would wish, and the alternative would be to sit around and never experience anything wonderful because my fear cripples my actions.I just can't let that happen.....but that doesn't mean this will be easy.xo,Barb